It is days like this that I am soooooo proud to say I am British. A truly remarkable lady surrounded by a wonderful family, one day I shall meet a Royal in person; I have several letters from HRH Prince Charles, one from HRH Prince Harry and I actually have a letter from the Boss herself, so my next aim is to meet one of them.
Not really sure where to begin or even if I should bother. Last year was a living nightmare and things are still far from wonderful. I cannot really complain but I do think that explanations are needed.
When Daddy was in Papworth Mum found friends she never even met and became friends with some truly remarkable people, but on the whole Mum sat by Dads bedside alone and scared. Instead of support and offers of help from other people Mum and I received veiled threats and abuse, constant grief and hassle from all angles. Mum even had to go to the police about a couple of things and that is why I stopped my writing. Even as I type this I am wondering who will start banging their gums and sending vile messages but life only gives you one shot and I will not be bullied by spineless idiots who are old enough to know better. Bring it on!!!!!! So what on earth has been happening you may well be wondering, has Dad recovered from his illness or has his PTSD been cured, if you are sitting comfortably I shall begin. Dad came out of hospital still extremely poorly and struggling to eat or drink, every four or five days he was readmitted and this went on for about two months. On the plus side Dad went to the amalgamation of his old regiment and went to Twickenham with two of his sons. Mum and I did not get an invite even though we both like the game played by men with odd shaped ..... On the negative side Dad and I are drifting further and further apart, he hardly speaks to me and I cannot do anything he actually approves of anymore. I love him sooooo much but I honestly think he woke up hating me, whatever I have done I am sorry but I miss having cuddles and Daddy Daughter time. Guess it is time to build myself another bridge get over it and then put yet another barrier up. I know Mum is hurting too she never smiles anymore and even when she says everything is ok I know it often isnt, Months of pneumonia meaning that Dad was backwards and forwards to hospital with Mum spending all her time with him, 2015 was a living hell. I had hoped that by Christmas all would be good, but I got that wrong too. Christmas morning Mum and I went to sort the animals out, got back to Dad being really nasty snide digs and moaning - Mum did what she does best these days walked out of his sight and cried Christmas Day evening was spent in A&E, Dad had plurasy and I was passing blood after being in a car accident a few days before. Mum was just a goffer between the cubicles. |
AuthorI am a normal teenager that has learnt to live with mental illness and want other kids who have similar lives to know they are not alone Archives
July 2017
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